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Eating Candy & Watching FRIENDS in Bed at 3pm

18 July, 2018

Every year you tell yourself that you crave this type of time. You say you are too stressed out and oh what you wouldn't give for some free time to just sit around and do nothing. You need a vacation and time to reflect and grow. You tell yourself that this what you like to do . . .  nothing.

There's something about sitting around and letting the day take you where it wants to that you absolutely love and you tell yourself that you are content with reading for twelve hours or drawing for twelve hours or essentially being on your phone for . . . twelves hours. But you're not. You want so much more with your life.



Every now and then you sink into a routine and you fall in love with the comfort but fall in loathe with the monotony. You can't face another day of doing the same thing because you're slapped with this sense that you're wasting your precious time on this earth. You think about quitting every book and art project halfway through because you feel like you're wasting precious time on this earth.

So you eat a good breakfast and do yoga and floss three times a day because you want a healthier you, but being healthy, doing the absolute bare minimum takes up your whole day. You don't remember the days being this short in October. You remember what it felt like to be tired. To look at new people every day and wear all the clothes in your wardrobe.

YOU WERE NOT MEANT FOR THIS COOKIE-CUTTER LIFe.

So you need to stop waiting. Just waiting for your food to settle. Just waiting for your nails to grow, just waiting for them to call you. Just wasting all of you time.

You have been dormant for too long darling, and you know it.

Change your blog theme, buy a guitar, dye your hair, and decorate your room - like you've always wanted to. Get out of the house for the first time this whole week. Start reading things in the sunlight. Take a shower. This is the road to recovery and it's longer than you thought it was.

The second step to becoming happy is actually doing the things you want to do and making your days longer. The first step is only wanting it.

You know that feeling when you are out with friends for a couple hours but it feels like it's been 10? When you've had a long productive day and this morning feels like last week? When you're working out and a minute feels like an hour? You need to chase that type of time-altering-rush more often than not, because otherwise the days will slow,

and they will blend together,

and you will forget what day it is

like you're doing right now.


I know that it's hard to make the summer days longer and feel more fulfilled when you don't have someone else telling you what to do. When you don't have the friends that you used to, or the money to drive where you want to drive. But you can't just accept these hot summer months as empty time. You need to wake up and not just survive everyday but live it. Create things and push yourself to finish them. Exercise because you are chasing things not because you are being chased. Don't take advantage of yourself and call it self care.

I hate this side of you. The side that watches nature documentaries for too long and eats dinner too late. The side that stays up until one in the morning because you think other people do it,

the side of you that has given up.


XOXOXO

4 comments:

  1. I adore this post!! Getting out of bed early and living life how you've wanted to is something we all need to do a litle bit more of. You blog theme is cute though! It's been a while since I have been on your blog.

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  2. I was taking a break from blogging for a little bit but I'm getting back into it, thank you so much!!

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  3. Your writing is so amazing and poetic in this post. It reminds me that there's only a month left of summer and I don't want to waste it. I need to make the most of it! I definitely love having my routines, but I think I forget how much I love experiencing new things and getting out in nature to explore!

    http://sarahgrapes.blogspot.com/

    Sarah Grace xoxo

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  4. Thank you so much! I was really trying to get myself a pep talk and I'm glad you felt inspired, I love your blog! ♡

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