Slider

the days blend together

05 April, 2020

We are in a weird place, friends. The days are blending together and my sleep schedule is quite abnormal. This time is where I like to think that I thrive because being stuck in the house all day lets me finally catch up on chores and art that I've been avoiding. I've always loved taking time to do absolutely nothing and just slow down the busy routine from day to day.

This is why I've always loved Sundays and Summer because I feel really at peace when I can sleep in, make a quality breakfast, read a book, and take time to enjoy the sunlight coming through windows because I don't have to rush to another place. Having to constantly think about how I am going to break my day down to go through a check list really stresses me out when I do it for a while and I really hope to be in a place one day where I feel like I am in much more control and can do the things that really make me happy.


I've been much calmer but also much lazier, which is something we all kind of struggle with during these breaks. I'm trying to take more advantage of this and look into fun hobbies I've been too busy to look at like writing, reading, and new fun things like roller skating. It's nice to take a step back and find the things that are really important to you.

When all of this started I also started to notice how much it was like my favorite dystopian/apocalypse novels. It's scary to think about how easily everything can just stop. How much we rely on everyone else, how interdependent we are.

The books always begin with weird cases on the news that happen in distant, far away places. Then the new stories start to catch up to your town and everyone panics for supplies and conspiracy theories commence. No one ever talks about this quite in between time and I am so grateful that real life has decided to change from the path of all of those books. A lot of the time these days I am grateful that real life is different from fantasy.



Most of all I think this time has just made me miss what was normal and I appreciate it more now. I am so eager for the summer and to spend days outside in the sunlight with friends. I've always thought that life would be so much better if we had more intermittent breaks to refocus rather than a long routine that is strict and endless. Too many things are strict and permanent and endless. I want to build a better life for myself someday and really reach my full potential, you know?

One day I'll have my own garden and grow a lot of food. One day I'll cook those fresh vegetables and finally enjoy being healthy. I'll do yoga everyday in an apartment perfectly curated to my style and I'll have large open windows to let in the sun. I'll make music. I'll make art. I'll adopt many dogs and volunteer and recycle and be as zero-waste and eco-friendly as possible and I never thought my dreams would be so simple like this. I always thought I was a more complicated person. Turns out not everything is what is seems.



At this point the days blend together. I am always wearing pajamas and getting creative with snacks. Trying to be productive. Dreaming of the things I'll do later. Dreaming of the summer.

Mostly I am catching up on the sleep I've missed this semester. Got accepted into an art program at my school so I'm trying to unwind. Doing everything that piques my interest and avoiding responsibilities. Waiting for everything to fall into place. I hope everything turns out okay. I hope things get back to normal.


XOXOXO

8 comments:

  1. I always enjoy this corner of the internet. I was captivated while reading this post because I relate so much so to the words you are writing as well as how you feel. The paragraph about if you had more time you'd do this and that and how you'll end up doing everything that is distracting is so relatable. Love ya! Let me know if you need anything or just want to have tea over video chat! wellnesswithvan is my instagram.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, I always appreciate your comments! I guess we are all in a really weird place right now and I might take you up on that offer. ♡

      Delete
  2. Ahh lovely words, lovely photos. Thank you for this. I hope you get as much rest as you can, and that you're able to do the things you love during this season. :) Stay safe!

    Anna Jo | http://helloannajo.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, I hope you're staying sane and safe during this time too! ♡

      Delete
  3. Everyday is a Sunday now, I'm slightly grateful that I'm classed as a Key Worker so I still have a routine of going to work most days. Congratulations on your art program, that's amazing news. Hopefully everything will get back to normal soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're lucky for having that routine & thank you! We could all use more normal right now ♡

      Delete
  4. I hope in the future we are all able to live a slow lifestyle, or at least live life in the pace we want to go at.
    I love this, and I don't feel bad for not going out because everyone is doing that.

    It's helping me reach my goals tbh like im working towards the goals ive been trying to work on, but LIFE WORK and other strict things like u say, got in my way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's so hard not being able to go out but it's a good time to be working on goals! Best of luck ♡

      Delete

CopyRight © Do not use content without contacting | Theme Designed By Hello Manhattan